Fig. A): Let’s examine the behavior of particles in a closed container.
（图A）：让我们来观察一下粒子在封闭容器中的行为。

(Fig. B): The more particles we squeeze into the container, the testier they will become, especially if the container happens to be a rush-hour downtown local at 86th and Lex.
（图B）：如果我们把更多的粒子挤入容器中，它们将变得易爆，特别是当这个容器正好是高峰期的下城86街和莱克星顿大道路口的那个地铁站。

(Fig. C): Usually the particles will distribute evenly, unless there is a weird-looking puddle on the floor.
（图c）：通常粒子会分布均匀，除非地板上有一滩奇怪的的不明液体。

The probability of finding a seat on the subway is inversely proportional to the number of people on the platform.
在地铁上找到座位的概率，与站台上的人数成反比。

Even worse, the utter absence of people is 100 percent proportional to just having missed the train.
更糟的是，如果站台上完全没有人，那么你百分之百的是误了刚开走的地铁。

To describe different phenomena, physicists use various units.
为了描述不同的现象，物理学家使用不同的单位。

PASCALS, for example, measure the pressure applied to a certain area.
比如，帕斯卡是用来测量某处面积所受压力的单位。

COULOMBS measure electric charge (that can occur if said area is a synthetic carpet)
库仑是测量静电电荷的单位（如果前述面积是一块合成纤维地毯的话，这种情况就有可能发生。）

DECIBELS measure the intensity of the trouble the physicist gets into because he didn‘t take off his shoes first.
分贝是测量麻烦强度的单位，——如果本物理专家忘了脱鞋的话。

Often those units are named after people to recognize historic contributions to their field of expertise. One NEWTON, for example, describes the force that is necessary to accelerate 1 kilogram of mass by one meter per second squared.
这些单位往往是用人的名字来命名，以纪念对该领域有历史性贡献的专家们。比如，一“牛顿”是使得一千克质量产生一米/秒平方的加速度所使用的力量。

This is not to be confused with one NIEMANN, which describes the force necessary to make a three-year-old put on his shoes and jacket when we’re already late for kindergarten.
这可不能跟“牛曼”搞混：一“牛曼”指的是在已经误了幼儿园的情况下，给一个三岁的孩子穿上鞋和外套所需要使用的力量。

Once the child is ready to go, I search for my keys. I start spinning around to scan my surroundings. This rotation exposes my head and all its contents to centrifugal forces, resulting in loss of hair and elongated eyeballs. That’s why I need to wear prescription glasses, which are yet another thing I constantly misplace.
一旦孩子准备好了，我就开始找钥匙。我开始不停的打转，四处察看。这种旋转使我的头及所有头上物品受到离心力影响，造成脱发和眼球拉长，从而使得我需要戴眼镜，而那也是我经常找不到的一样东西。

Since Antoine Lavoisier, we all know that “matter can be neither created nor destroyed, though it can be rearranged,” which, sadly, it eventually will.
从安托万·拉瓦锡开始，我们都知道“物质既不能创造也不能消灭，但它可以重新排列”。可悲的是，它最终的确如此。

Not everything can be explained through physics, though. I’ve spent years searching for a rational explanation for the weight of my wife??s luggage. There is none. It is just a cruel joke of nature.
不过，也不是什么都可以用物理来解释。我花了多年时间为我妻子的行李重量寻找合理的解释。根本就没有理由。这就是大自然开的一个残忍玩笑。